The past few weeks have been tough for me. Actually, scrap that. The past few MONTHS have been tough. No, scrap that too. The past YEAR has been tough! A combination of unfortunate life events has made it a very stressful and difficult time and my emotions have been all over the place. My husband’s ongoing unemployment, financial stress, missed opportunities, family worries, the recent death of a very close family member, uncertainty around life direction, and that’s merely the short list. It has been a turbulent and uncertain time. And I don’t like uncertainty. I rather like to know what’s coming next. Stability. Structure. Purpose. Direction. This is where I am most comfortable. But sometimes life throws you some curve balls and you have no choice but to sink or swim. Here are three things that help me to stay afloat when I feel like I am drowning:…
May is a great month. Smack bang in the middle of autumn (the Fall for my northern followers) we celebrate Mothers’ Day (Sunday, 10 May). This significant day allows us to celebrate and appreciate the mums and mum figures in our lives. But this year, I want to think beyond it being just one day.
I am dedicating the month of May to kindness. I am dedicating the month of May to celebrating mothers. I am dedicating the month of May to acts of compassion. I am dedicating the month of May to….
‘Make a mum smile in May’.
Modern life is fast and furious. We are overcommitted, overscheduled and over-connected. Most of us are working long hours, managing a family and social obligations, and trying to fit in exercise, errands, and all the other activities of modern life.
The majority of parents feel like they don’t have enough time for themselves, but mothers are especially burdened by this feeling. Whether you are working inside or outside the home, being a mother means making adjustments, compromises and sacrifices every day. Often, “me time” is made up of what scraps are leftover at the end of the day. I wrote this article recently about being in a state of mothering burnout. It resonated with so many women, partly because we women tend to overlook their own needs.
Taking time out for yourself is not indulgent; it is critical, but it doesn’t come easily. The good news,as I have discovered, is it gets easier with practice. Here are four tips to help you get some of the often elusive, yet all-important, “me time.”…
“You can’t have ecstasy without agony,” said the midwife to me whilst I was in the throes of transitional labour. She was trying to be encouraging, but at that stage I couldn’t see any relief in sight and I wanted to skip the agony part and get straight to the ecstasy! I realised, later, that she was right. The pain and pleasure were intimately linked and I needed to endure one to experience the other. In a similar way, the dichotomy of pain and pleasure typifies the motherhood experience.
One of the things I find interesting about mothering is that the very source of your happiness can also be a source of frustration and suffering. Motherhood is layered with complexity; it connects you with feelings and emotions that are new and raw, and these emotions seesaw continuously. Part of the problem, perhaps, lies in our expectations. We tend to think we should be enjoying motherhood all the time, particularly if it is something we have yearned for. So, we often feel guilty when we feel unhappy….