Disappointment. It’s an emotion we all experience from time to time. It can range from slight to severe and it’s often unavoidable. If you’ve ever been in the job market for ‘some time’ you will probably have suffered the disappointment of not getting an interview, or the job itself. Sometimes our disappointment is directly linked to our greatest desires, like wanting to have our baby, or forming a lasting relationship. We often feel disappointed by the people closest to us in our lives, and sometimes we feel disappointed by people we have not even met (Lance, I am looking at you!). And as parents, we often feel it on behalf of our children – and this disappointment can be particularly hard to swallow….
Find time to exercise.
One of the many casualties of motherhood, for me, is exercise. This is partly due to the fact that every time I recover from giving birth long enough to get a grip on my life, I get pregnant again. I’ve dabbled in yoga, tennis, jogging and skipping (Yes, skipping – don’t knock it till you’ve tried it) but nothing is sustainable. Either my interest peters out or my body no longer responds – it always comes to a halt….
I remember the first time I took my baby on public transport just a few weeks after her birth. I decided to take the train into the city whilst she slept in her bassinette. Sounds easy enough but I remember feeling anxious as I mentally rehearsed all the steps. How would I get the monster-sized pram onto the train? Would the gap between platform and train be too big? Could the wheels get stuck? What if the doors closed before I had time to get in? Would someone come to my aid? Would I need to ask a stranger for help?
Life as a stay-at-home mother of three pre-schoolers is tough. It is also very busy. My three children are heavily dependant on me and they shadow me all day long. Life is spent primarily at the home and it’s a fairly domestic existence. Ground Hog Day is a common syndrome in an endless cycle of feeding, washing, nappy changing and sleeping. And, as every mum knows, there is no such thing as ‘free time’.
These days I do everything fast. I eat fast. Drink fast. Talk fast. Email fast. Walk fast. Shower fast. There is nothing leisurely about my day at all. It can be hard to enjoy your kids amidst the noise and business of daily life. At the moment I am focusing on meeting their primary needs and there’s not a lot of time leftover for anything else. A friend of mine recently asked me how I make space for ‘slow mothering’ as opposed to ‘fast mothering’.
I have just enjoyed four tranquil days of slow mothering.