Not another slippery dip

Embracing the messy, mundane & momentous

Comparisons and complaints about motherhood

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Spinning in the garden

Spinning in the garden

People are often quick to tell you that you haven’t reached the most difficult stage of motherhood yet.

As a first-time mother you devote all your time and energy to your newborn baby. It’s a steep learning curve and being responsible for a little baby is all consuming. I remember shortly after the birth of my first child someone declared, “Babies are so easy. Just wait till she’s mobile – that’s when things get hard.”  It’s not the most encouraging thing to say to a new mum but unsolicited advice  (and sense of entitlement) is part of the motherhood experience….

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Happy Birthday Miss H

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IMG_0577A year ago, at exactly this time, I first laid eyes on my beautiful third baby. She was placed immediately on my chest and I was the one to announce to my husband that we had another girl. During the ensuing minutes I was filled with an indescribable happiness for what our family had become.

Today we celebrated Miss H’s first birthday. It’s a cliche I know, but the year has gone far too fast. As I reflect on the first year of her life, I wanted to share with you my birth story.  This story has just been published in the March edition of Practical Parenting magazine. …

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Playdate etiquette – is praise the protocol?

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playdateRecently my three-year old (Miss A) had her first play-date at our house with a girl from her preschool. She had been asking to have ‘Isabelle’ around for a long time and seemed to greatly admire her. I wasn’t sure how much attention they paid each other at preschool, but given my daughter is quite timid socially, I was pleased she wanted her to friend to come and play.

I arranged it with Isabelle’s mother who said she’d be happy to leave Isabelle with me alone. I think the term is ‘drop and go’, or ‘’drop and run’. Isabelle’s mother is not a stranger to me. I have spoken to her at the drop off and pick up scramble but I don’t know her well. I can’t imagine doing the drop and dash with my daughter as she is very clingy and she wouldn’t have the confidence to go it solo. But I know that other kids are different so this arrangement was fine….

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Beyond the baby phase

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holly mamaMy baby has just turned nine months old. And whilst I am still referring to her as my “baby” she no longer seems like a baby. I was hoping she wouldn’t be in such a hurry to grow up but she is clearly in a desperate hurry to keep up with her sisters. I wish she would slow down. When each of my other daughters was nine months old, I was already pregnant with another baby growing inside me. This time I am not, nor do I intend to be. I notice myself touching my tummy sometimes, subliminally yearning to feel those little bubbles  – the early signs of life.  But there is nothing there (only a rounded belly – the imprint of having been stretched three times in three years)!

It occurs to me now that my baby has had her final feed, that I am no longer needed by her in the same way. She has shown her preference for the bottle over my breast and she decided this without forewarning.  I wasn’t intending on breastfeeding her for much longer but I had hoped to hold onto one feed a day for a little while longer. In any case, I had hoped to be aware of our “final” feed together but she made it abundantly clear one morning that she was no longer satisfied with what she was receiving from me. For a week I tried to coax her into a final feed but it was not to be. I am no longer her physical lifeline. I am all dried up.

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