Becoming a mother is life-changing
The third day of April is a very significant day for me. It’s the day I reflect on the experience that most changed my life. Four years ago on this day I gave birth to my first baby. It’s the day I stared in utter amazement and wonder at my daughter. It’s the day I became a mother.
On the 3rd of April 2009, on a wild and stormy autumn day, my long-awaited daughter was born. After much coaxing and a fair degree of force, Miss A was placed in my arms and she was the most perfect thing I have ever seen. Oblivious to her pronounced cone head (a result of the aforementioned force) I felt a surge of emotion that will almost certainly be the greatest experience of my life.
I had anticipated that moment for a very long time – far longer than 9 months. I had wanted to be a mother for a large part of my life. I yearned to have children and create a big family. Perhaps I wanted to recreate my own experiences because I had such a loving mother and great family life. I enjoyed a privileged upbringing brimming with of opportunity, education and adventure. I was lucky to grow up with four siblings by my side and parents who shaped our futures by providing us with basic building blocks for life: love, support and trust.
I would have gone to great lengths to become a mum but fortunately I was very blessed and when the time was right in our lives, we conceived Miss A with very little effort at all. The births of all my children were amazing but there’s nothing quite like your first, and the passion and intensity of the moment you become a mum.
Learning about myself through mothering is fascinating. I talk here on my blog about the experience of motherhood. Motherhood brings many challenges and sacrifices but there are great personal rewards too. Becoming a mother has irrevocably changed me. There are some obvious changes and some more subtle ones – changes that have crept up on me.
Motherhood has given me a greater appreciation for the gift of life. It has reinforced my set of values and beliefs. It has enabled me to connect with others more easily and see different shades and perspectives. It has softened me; it has shown me how to love more freely and how to express love. I feel a strong sense of fulfilment as a mother. I know, without reservation, that this is the essential ingredient of my life. Motherhood is the greatest expression of who I am. I know that I am making a difference – a vital contribution to three important lives. Overall I feel more confident now than I ever have. I feel calmer. I feel grateful. I have everything I ever dreamed of having.
Becoming a mum has highlighted the cycle of life and given me a greater appreciation for nature. It has brought into sharp focus my own mortality and how precarious and precious life is. But most of all, it has reconnected me with my childhood and the child within me. And there’s nothing more liberating than being silly with your children. In these moments, when I shed all inhibitions and responsibilities, I am not a mum. I am “me”, 30 years ago, having the best bloody time of my life.
My special Miss A made my transition to motherhood very gentle and easy. And she continues to be an absolute joy to be around. I am a better person because of her influence. She is inherently kind and compassionate and she sees the best in every situation. She fascinates me and she fills my days with an energy that didn’t exist before her time. It’s hard to describe this energy but it’s something I feel very deeply. It’s spiritual. It is such a privilege to know her; the fact that she is my daughter is the greatest blessing of my life.
Happy Birthday Miss A. May your fifth year be filled with exciting discoveries, adventure and bucket loads of fun!
How Gorgeous. Miss A will so enjoy reading this one day. What a gift.
Thanks Jacqui. I will share this story with her one day 🙂
Ps. Happy Birthday Miss A.
Will you share all the post labour stories too!!? LOL. 😉
Happy birthday ,not so little anymore, Miss A! X
I’ll choose carefully which posts I share with them when they’re older!! 🙂
Yes, Miss A is not so little anymore. Psychologically it’s a big win for me – having a 1, 2 and 3 year old was exhausting just to acknowledge!!
Yay happy birthday little miss A. A big day for you and her I imagine. She’s lucky to have you too x
Thanks Lindy. Yes, it was a big day for both of us!!
What a wonderful wonderful story – now have a glass of bubbles because you are one brilliant mum x
Thanks Claire. Let the party begin! Bubbles on ice 🙂
I’ve been a Mum for 18 and 1/2 years and wouldn’t change the decision I made at 17 to have that baby. Made me stronger, happier and more alive than I have ever known. Happy birthday to your little princess.
Popping over via iVillage where we are both featured today 🙂
Thanks for stopping by. It’s funny because I took at look at your site today and got a lot of inspiration on kids birthday parties!! So glad you are happier than ever before. Yes, having children certainly makes you feel alive, even if it’s a ‘tired’ alive sometimes 🙂
Thanks Annaleis
I’ve also discovered your blog through the same post over on iVillage – very humbled to be in such amazing company (exactly one month in the blogosphere today!) what a beautiful letter for Miss A, happy 4th birthday!
Thank you! I am glad you popped over for a visit. Congratulations on one month in the blogosphere! I will check out your site. I hope to show this post to Miss A one day…
Motherhood is without doubt the most challenging, rewarding, frustrating, joyous, infuriating and wonderful job in the world.
Wait till your children are teenagers … then you’ll really get to understand all about the challenging, frustrating and infuriating bits :0)
Oh gosh, and with 3 teenage girls in the house, it will be full of EMOTION!! So, I should enjoy the toddler years hey?! 🙂
That’s so beautiful! You express your self well.
Cheers,
Lynda.
Thank you Lynda. Expression is easy when the topic is close to your heart. Thanks for reading 🙂
Lovely post Michaela! Motherhood is definitely one of the big growth experiences! Thanks for Rewinding.
Thanks Allison. Yes, you grow in many ways, and it’s not just around the waist! 🙂
Love this post. Im about to become a mum for the first time in a few weeks and I have a lot of the same feelings about it as you have expressed in this post. I cant wait.
Thank you Toni, and, congratulations!! I am excited for you – you are about to embark on the most thrilling stage of your life. Best of luck for your birth and beyond. I would love to hear how you get on. Feel free to follow my blog, or like my Facebook page as a way of staying in touch. I have a few pregnant followers and ensure that my content is relevant to the first-time mums especially. 🙂