While many of you celebrated Father’s Day today with your partners and family, we did things a little differently. Instead of giving my hubby brekkie in bed, or going on a family picnic together, I gave him the ultimate Father’s Day gift – the entire day with the kids on his own!
Admittedly, I didn’t actually know it was Father’s Day when I begged him to take the girls away for a night to give me a much needed break. Anyone who has experienced the shackles of a child suffering intense separation anxiety will understand the desperateness of the situation! Once my ‘day off’ was in the diary, there was no turning back. So we just brought Father’s Day a day forward in our house and the girls showered him with affection and hand-made presents (courtesy of kinder, play group & music) for about five minutes yesterday morning.
When I waved goodbye to them in the driveway my heart initially ached. I suddenly didn’t want to be apart from them. What had I done? But then I remembered what the previous weeks had been like and I shook myself out of it. This was ME time and I was going to enjoy it, dammit! For 30 hours I had the freedom to do whatever I pleased.
I’d love to say I hit the town with heels, lippie and a couple of girlfriends, but the truth is I didn’t. All my girlfriends are either pregnant; have just given birth; or are simply too tired from kid wrangling to stay up past 9.o clock. Instead what I did was very simple, and I highly recommend it to anyone suffering from parental fatigue. I enjoyed my own company. I didn’t see a soul but I walked; I read; I wrote; I cooked, and I reflected. I had a lovely time.
During my 30 hours of solitude I also discovered that:
1. The sound of silence is bliss. I used to consider the sound of a champagne cork popping the greatest sound imaginable, but silence has trumped it. Silence is still; silence is comforting; silence is gold.
2. My house actually looks half decent when there are no kids in it!
3. Even the most menial tasks like decluttering cupboards and mopping floors become pleasurable activities when you perform them slowly, with no background noise or movement.
4. Cooking is actually quite enjoyable when you don’t have a baby on your hip and two toddlers at your feet posing enormous H&S risks and creating chaos and MESS.
5. There is an entire world outside of my four walls which I reunited myself with in the form of the Saturday paper, back to back. I lie. The sport and business sections may have been folded and placed in a spot awaiting my hubby’s return.
6. Watching a DVD without interruption is a lovely way to spend a night in. I can’t remember much about the plot but Jude Law provided 2 hours of viewing pleasure.
7. Finishing an entire cup of coffee in one sitting has to be one of life’s greatest pleasures.
8. Finishing an entire meal on one’s own, without being interrupted to wipe a child’s bottom, break up a near-fatal fight; remove the chocking hazard from Miss H’s mouth, is a rare treat.
9. Having the entire bed to one’s self is a luxury that is underrated. But going to be on one’s own is lonely.
10. I could still hear my girls call out for me from the rooms they weren’t sleeping in
11. I missed my girls like crazy, and our reunion was the real highlight of my retreat.
12. That home-made craft gifts may not be my thing, but nothing says, “You’re the greatest dad ever & thank you for giving me my sanity back,” more than home made Crème Brulee…
Happy Fathers’ Day!
Have you ever enjoyed child-free day or night? How did you spend your time? Or, if you haven’t experienced it yet, what’s your idea of the perfect way to spend that time?
Sounds like bliss!
It certainly was, Daniela. I was quickly thrown back into parenting duties though, as my 4 y-yr-old had vomited all over herself and the car a few minutes before arriving home!
That sounds like an amazing day, even if you didn’t hit the town. I have a child free day on Wednesday before heading back to work after 12 months off. I am torn between catching up with a friend for lunch and a movie or staying home cleaning the house in peace, stocking up on food and meals for the bub etc. Tough one 🙂 Glad you enjoyed your me time.
Thanks Renee. I understand your ‘conflict.’ On the one hand, a movie and lunch with a friend sounds ideal. But on the other hand, getting “prepared” for this big change in your life may make you feel more in control. Can you do both? Maybe skip the movie, but do lunch and spend some quiet time at home. I feel SO much better having had some time to myself. I enjoyed my own company. The town will still be there when I am ready to hit it, and when i do it’s going to be BIG! 🙂
It’s quite amazing the way we develop a love for the simple things as parents. I both lament and celebrate that fact at exactly the same time. Sounds like you have such love and care for each other. Glad you had a great Father’s Day no matter when you chose to celebrate x
I know. It’s almost a bid sad that domestic duties in silence qualifies as “fun.” But the mind and body need a break, and sometimes simply doing things at a slower pace is enough…. 🙂
haha this is what I call one of the upsides of single parenting. I get 24 hours child free in a week. I love it. I usually allow myself to use that time just for me (so no working or studying required unless the pressure is really on). I also usually opt for a night in. I much prefer it to going anywhere. I can tidy up a bit, cook, watch a show or two or a movie etc. I am a bit of a homebody and love my own company so it doesn’t feel lonely at all. Even though I can’t sleep in I always get up and get a coffee and some brekky and take it back to bed where I watch my fav show on my laptop. Sometimes I might doze off again, sometimes not and I never get up permanent before 9am! The only downside is that sometimes I get scared being the only one in the house and sometimes I find myself still listening out for him even though he isn’t there BIzarre. Glad you got to enjoy some mummy free time. Oh and how good are the father’s day things from Kindy etc. I was in a flap trying to get stuff organised for Monkey’s dad when Monkey came home form childcare with a card and a picture made. Score!!!
Like you, spending time by myself does not feel lonely to me. I reckon I am pretty good company 🙂
I had nothing organised for Father’s Day and I am so uncrafty so I was thrilled when Miss A came home from Kinder with a hand painted apron. Cool, hey?. I wonder if it will inspire him to get in the kitchen? I think not. The BBQ perhaps…
Enjoy those 24 hours! You deserve them xx
I’m a SAHM and whilst I’ve loved having the children home for the holidays, I’m also looking forward to having a little peace and quiet when they go back to school, even if it is while I do the housework. It’s so much easier getting it done while they are at school 🙂
Oh yes, I cam imagine you will enjoy creating some ‘order’ again after having them at home for the holidays. It’s lovely to have holidays, but it’s also lovely when they go back :-). Enjoy the peace and quiet.
Sounds great Mich, how very Nigella of you. Did you cook and clean in the nude? I would have skipped the housework but its nice to get things done when the kids aren’t there. Glad you feel relaxed, better than having a hangover I assure you.
Sorry to disappoint you, Jacqui, but I did not cook and clean in the nude. And I didn’t do a late night visit to the fridge either like Nigella does. She is far sexier than me! The housework was a necessary evil but I got it done fast and then I enjoyed “me” time. Unfortunately I was welcomed back to motherhood by a child covered in vomit courtesy of car sickness. As desperate as I was to hug Miss A, I decided to hold off until after I had showered her!!
What a fabulous break for you – well deserved 🙂 I was nodding my head through all of your points lol.
I long for a quiet cup of coffee or a meal at times. I am lucky the kids go to daycare some days so I can have a break. And yes, most of the time it is domestic ‘bliss’ that is attained – but there is something to be said for mopping in peace ha ha.
So glad you could relate, Michelle. Yes, mopping in peace is almost meditative in comparison isn’t it?! Funny, how things change…
Oh yes. I got a steam mop and was WAY too excited about it lol
What a lovely way to recharge your batteries, and those creme brulees look incredible! I dream of starting and finishing the paper all in the same day. That really is bliss! I did wonder if this is an indication of what your mothers’ day present might be?!
Ah yes, and luckily I made a few extra creme brulees so that we can repeat the experience tonight. The experience was lovely and I definitely feel recharged. And predictably, the girls were ANGELS for their dad so I have suggested that we make this a more regular thing 🙂
What a fantastic break! I was relaxed just reading this! Although I hear you about still hearing your girls, even when they are not there. On the rare nights we are apart from the boys, I still stir thinking that I have heard them wake up or call me x